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Home/Satire - The Onion/Stephen King’s Best And Worst Books
Stephen King’s Best And Worst Books

Stephen King’s Best And Worst Books

October 28, 2026

Stephen King’s Best And Worst Books

Since 1974, Stephen King has published more than 65 novels and novellas. The Onion identifies the horror master’s five best and five worst works. 

Explore the list in detail

Best

Small Cujo

The follow-up to King’s bestselling 1981 novel dares to ask the question “What if Cujo was a five-pound Chihuahua mix?”

Devil Spawn

King’s opus about a possessed child terrorizing his neighbors led to an infamous feud with director Chris Columbus after its film adaptation was sanitized into Home Alone.

The Fingers

This spine-tingling story about a man who wakes up and discovers that all 10 of his fingers have turned into middle fingers remains one of King’s most terrifying tales.

I, Stephen King, Will Come To Your House And Stab You

Still considered one of the most frightening books ever written, despite King only doing this to a few readers.

Under The Domes

What’s better than one dome? Two domes.

Worst

The Noise

A couple is awoken by a mysterious noise outside, but both are too scared to check and see what it was, so they go back to sleep.

Master Of Wetness

In this novel, King introduces readers to an underwhelming new monster called the “Sponge Vampire,” an undead creature who sneaks into people’s kitchens to suck the moisture out of their wet sponges.

Cheryl

A friendless teen girl struggles to take revenge on her bullies when her only superpower is a tolerance to lactose.

Lucifer’s Banquet

A mild-mannered insurance salesman from Maine accidentally runs over a demon’s foot with his lawn mower. As punishment, the demon forces him to eat hot dogs until he dies. He dies after eating four hot dogs. The book is 900 pages long.

Do You Party

King’s 1982 novel was panned by critics as a thinly veiled attempt at soliciting readers to send him cocaine in the mail.

The post Stephen King’s Best And Worst Books appeared first on The Onion.

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