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Home/Satire - The Onion/Everything We Know About ‘Grand Theft Auto VI’ So Far

Everything We Know About ‘Grand Theft Auto VI’ So Far

September 17, 2026

After two delays, the highly anticipated Grand Theft Auto VI will be released this November. Here is everything we know about the game so far.


Open-world activities include playing volleyball, chess, cards, or GTA V


Gunshot sound effects performed by Sir Ian McKellen


Child support payments carry over from the real world


Cars driven in game for more than an hour required to get emissions check


Contains a 1:1 recreation of Miami-Dade’s Our Lady of Mercy Catholic Cemetery, where Honeymooners legend Jackie Gleason is buried


Contains over 30 in-game podcasts about the fascinating history of the cocoa bean


Only the first four generations of Pokémon are catchable in Vice City


Players must scan their real-life faces to determine whether or not strippers will sleep with them


Still absolutely forbidden in this house, young man

The post Everything We Know About ‘Grand Theft Auto VI’ So Far appeared first on The Onion.

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