Skip to content
Humoro.us Humoro.us

It's all made up.

Humoro.us Humoro.us

It's all made up.

  • Home
  • Home
Humoro.us Humoro.us

It's all made up.

Humoro.us Humoro.us

It's all made up.

  • Home
  • Home
Home/Satire - The Onion/Former Rep. Eric Swalwell Admits To ‘Physical Relations’ With Chinese Spy
Former Rep. Eric Swalwell Admits To ‘Physical Relations’ With Chinese Spy

Former Rep. Eric Swalwell Admits To ‘Physical Relations’ With Chinese Spy

August 24, 2026

Newly declassified documents show former Rep. Eric Swalwell admitted to the FBI that he had “physical relations” with a suspected Chinese spy on a handful of occasions. What do you think?

“Let’s not let geopolitics cheapen what they had.”

Soren Murnahan, Systems Analyst


“Sex is a healthy part of the spy-asset relationship.”

Wyatt Morales, Crowd Wrangler


“If China thinks Eric Swalwell is important, they can’t know that much.”

Freya Blankenship, Eraser Tester

The post Former Rep. Eric Swalwell Admits To ‘Physical Relations’ With Chinese Spy appeared first on The Onion.

Author

Syndicator

Follow Me
Other Articles
Previous

Dad Stuns Family With Proclamation He Believes In Werewolves

Next

Dad Suggests Beating Traffic By Leaving Game After First Inning

Recent Posts

  • Trump Boasts Tariffs A Huge Success At Making Things Expensive
  • ‘I’ll Need A Gift Receipt,’ Lies Man Buying $270 ‘Lord Of The Rings’ Lego Set
  • Voter Fraud By The Numbers
  • Trump Slams The Beauty Of A Lotus Flower In Scathing Truth Social Haiku
  • FBI Investigating Suspicious Substance Sent To Congressional Offices

Categories

  • Satire – Hard Drive
  • Satire – SatireWire
  • Satire – The Borrowitz Report
  • Satire – The Hard Times
  • Satire – The Onion
  • Uncategorized

Archives

  • October 2026
  • September 2026
  • August 2026
  • July 2026
  • June 2026
  • December 2020
  • June 2019
  • September 2018
  • June 2018
  • February 2018
  • December 2017

You May Have Missed

Satire - The Onion

Trump Boasts Tariffs A Huge Success At Making Things Expensive

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Satire - The Onion

‘I’ll Need A Gift Receipt,’ Lies Man Buying $270 ‘Lord Of The Rings’ Lego Set

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Satire - The Onion

Voter Fraud By The Numbers

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Satire - The Onion

Trump Slams The Beauty Of A Lotus Flower In Scathing Truth Social Haiku

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
FBI Investigating Suspicious Substance Sent To Congressional Offices
Satire - The Onion

FBI Investigating Suspicious Substance Sent To Congressional Offices

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Satire - The Onion

Poll: Majority Of Americans Still Go Bonkers For Amber Waves Of Grain

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Trump Furious After "Pro Kings" Rally Draws Sparse Crowd
Satire - The Borrowitz Report

Trump Furious After “Pro Kings” Rally Draws Sparse Crowd

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Satire - The Hard Times

Help! My Coworker Asked for Horror Movie Recs, and Now I Have To Speak to HR

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026
Satire - The Hard Times

TSA Agent Pats Down Family at End of Long Workday 

Syndicator
By Syndicator
October 19, 2026

Hey, there's nothing else on this page, you're at the footer.

Copyright 2026 — Humoro.us. All rights reserved.